kerryoneal.com

Because I believe in the efficiency of a free market, I assume that radio broadcast companies know what they’re doing, and that there must be some characteristic of the human nature that wants to hear other people babble on the radio in the morning. As long as I live I shall probably never understand it, but why else would morning radio be so consumed with half-witted conversation that is largely absent from the programming schedule throughout the rest of the day? Perhaps it is some vestigial throwback to a common ancestor we shared with birds (who seem to also enjoy a good mindless babble in the morning.) I hope it’s not a very adaptive trait as it seems to have been omitted, or at the very least masked, in my genome pair.

I keep seeing these commercials advertising dog food that gives your canines boundless energy. They showcase dogs running, bouncing, and dragging their owners over the ground. Wouldn’t it be easier to sell dog food that makes your pets lethargic and listless? Perhaps I’m biased.